Red Skelton on John Wayne

 Here are a few jokes and anecdotes that Red Skelton might have used in reference to John Wayne

1."John Wayne was so tough, he once broke a mirror over his own head and got seven years of good luck!"

2."You know, I once asked John Wayne if he ever gets tired of being called 'The Duke.' He said, 'Red, I don't mind it at all – it's better than being called 'The Princess!'"

3."I had the pleasure of working with John Wayne once. He was so tall, I had to stand on a box just to get in the same frame. And he still looked down on me!"

4."John Wayne had a walk that was all his own. They say he walked like that because he had one leg longer than the other. I say it was because he was always in a hurry to get to the saloon!"

5."John Wayne made so many westerns, he once told me, 'Red, if I have to ride one more horse, I'm going to ask for a saddle with a cushion!'"

6."People always said John Wayne wasn't afraid of anything. But I found out his one fear: he was terrified of running out of coffee!"

7."John Wayne could walk into a room and command it without saying a word. I tried that once, but they just thought I was lost and showed me the way out!"

8."John Wayne was the ultimate cowboy. I once saw him rope a steer, tie it up, and grill a steak all at the same time. And he did it without spilling his drink!"

9."John Wayne had that deep, gravelly voice. When he talked, you listened. When I tried to do the same, people thought I had a frog in my throat!"

10"John Wayne was so popular, even his horses had fan clubs!"